Here it comes! Here comes the week when I annoy everyone around me, and even myself a little. The week that I will be consumed by,
“This is the lasssst time…”
The last weekend without Quinn. The last Monday with just Leah and I. The last dinner as a family of three. The last doctor’s appointment. The last time I’ll sleep through the night (ok, so that ended a while ago, but you get it). The last night only putting one sweet girl to bed. The last time Quinn goes crazy in the shower. The lassssst…. the incredibly long list will get even more obnoxious as the days drag on. I will pick at everything to find any sort of meaning and excitement at all.
We’re on the 10 day forecast (always my judge of when something is close). We’re at 39 weeks; we won’t see 40. We technically have “less than a week.” I mean, it’s getting a little intense.
It doesn’t seem like such a profound statement when you first say, “we should have a (another) baby,” until these very moments. When the end is so close – then you kind of wish someone would have smacked you the second you said those words – just to make sure you realized how much of a big deal it actually is. You make your baby, take your pregnancy test, get really excited, plan and eat and wait your way through 10 months and then all of a sudden you realize (like you’ve never realized before) that in less a week there will be a new baby in your arms. And in our case, another new baby. Even writing that, with italics, doesn’t begin to capture how huge this all is. She’s coming. As in this time next Friday while you are all going about your business – I will be holding the little Quinn God created, we put into action, I grew, and the doctor handed to Kyle… perfectly gooey.
And this is the last Friday we will have without her in color. Something tells me my horrible sleep isn’t going to be improving in the next six days…
I’m not the only one excited (not by a long shot); but Quinn’s big sister I think is about to bust. I actually do think she gets it. She knows what babies are. She knows that our baby is in my belly. She knows the doctor checks on her. She knows that she is coming out soon. And I think she’s actually really, very excited to see her. We’ve been reading Leah’s baby book a lot. It’s a shutterfly book I made when she was born; basically telling her her birth story with lots of pictures. And we’ve read it a million times in the past few months… and we explain that just like the doctor took Leah out of my belly… the doctor is going to take Quinn out of my belly. She’s a smart kid, and that’s not too hard of a concept… she gets it. I think at this point she’s just ready to get the show on the road. She’s probably about to call my bluff, I mean how often can you say, “soon.” Yesterday she lifted my shirt and said, “baby dance and clap our hands, too?” (Ps, dancing and clapping is her thing right now). And today asked if the baby wanted some fruit loops. Ha. God love her. And as if she’s reminding herself, she says multiple times a day, “baby coming soon, soon, soon.” I just can’t take it anymore! I can’t wait to see these two together! In less than a week!
So in my last week of pregnancy… I’m ready. Can you tell? Ha. I am large. Quinn is large. Quinn is strong. It’s painful to sit and rest because of the feet and elbows that are constantly protruding from my ridiculous looking midsection. I pee every 5 minutes, and the minutes in between I constantly feel like i have to pee. I don’t sleep without Tylenol PM. I walk up the stairs and have to catch my breath for 10 minutes. I get at least 7000 braxton hicks contractions a day. I cleaned the bathroom and thought I was in labor. Drinking a cold glass of water (actually a big craving) makes me grimace because I know the beating that’s coming as soon as it hits her snug and comfy body. I don’t sleep with covers, and usually wake up sweating and have to separate my stomach which involuntarily lands on my legs, which feels about as good as ripping hot, sweaty legs off of a leather seat. If I eat more than a fistful sized meal it stays in my esophagus/throat for at least three hours. It’s a pretty good time I’m having over here. But really, it’s hard and uncomfortable, but I wouldn’t trade it. I still weirdly like being pregnant and whining about all of the above. I love watching the circus that goes on in my belly. I love that her heartbeat is still as strong and as fast as ever. But I love that the end is near 🙂
I’m dying to see this kid. I’ve had five dreams of her… she had hair and looked the same in every one of them. I had three dreams of Leah and she had no hair and looked about like she did in real life so that is making me extra anxious. Will they look alike? Complete opposite? Will she be 16lbs? Easier or harder than Leah? Will she sleep ever (right now it’s a firm no). Will she do everything early like big sister or will she be my favorite lazy child? And oh my God, how will we all handle teething again. Those memories are still vividly planted in my brain.
It’s going to be a week of remembering Leah’s birth, of saying this is the lassssst to anyone that will listen, of counting days and hours, of packing and repacking, of trying to find sesame seed bagels (seriously, where are they?!) for one very needy Nana, of studying, of stewing, of not sleeping because of excitement… and a little fear… and a little discomfort, of imaging Quinn, of imagining Thursday night and Friday morning, of imagining Leah holding Quinn, of imagining bringing this sweet girl home and her brother barging at us – of warm, and wonderful and scary and exciting thoughts.
This is the last week, guys. The countdown is truly on.
Wanna do something fun? Kyle and I placed our bets on how big this kid will actually be. To give you a reference, I said 9lb 8oz. And I think I guessed under, ha. But who knows, maybe I’m just a wuss this time around and she’s only 7lbs. Wanna place your bet? If you live close to us – you will win a cookie that is a specialty of mine and Leah’s. If not, well, you can have pride in yourself. You can leave your guess in the comment section.
Here are some helpful hints:
Kyle was 7.11
I was 9.9
Leah was 8.8
Duncan is 89