Sister Bears.

Well, someone grew up overnight. The littlest someone. Just like that, she looks different. Bigger. Less newborny.

But, it has inspired me. Do these little girls of ours resemble each other? When Quinn came out (with a head full of hair) my first reaction was – No Way! I just didn’t see Leah. Now, sometimes I do. Sometimes. If I squint. When her head is cocked just so. Or when she screams at just the right volume. Or when I catch a random glance – I can see it. I can see the sisterness.

However, I still don’t think their “twins,” which is what everyone (their dad) seemed to think would happen. Leah’s got some strong daddy genes in her – she came out a female clone of his. Quinn’s got a little more of a healthy mix I believe. I tried to dig up pictures that I thought did resemble each other to be fair… And I picked them at the same ages.

I don’t know – what do you think? Twins? Sister bears? Individuals?

Let’s have a look-see:

Quinn … Leah.

Leah… Quinn (Goofs. Both of ’em).

Leah… Quinn.

Leah… Quinn. (OH MY GOD LEAH WAS BALD!)

Leah… Quinn. (The second one is truly edible).

Leah… Quinn. (Quinn today. Love her sweet little spirit).

Leah… Quinn. (By now I’m sure you can tell on your own…)

I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did. Gosh, I don’t remember Leah being this age. Or that bald. What a squirt. So grateful to have two happy and healthy sisters.

Oh, and one more before I go because it’s my current favorite of the little one:

So you can’t see much of her face – but that’s not the focal point of the picture. Do you remember when I said she’d have hair? And her dad insisted it wasn’t possible?

Well.

I win.

Surviving.

What a week!

I am very happy to say, though, we are all surviving. Better than surviving most of the time, much to my surprise. I will admit I was terrified to think of Kyle leaving us. I had horrible images running through my mind. I doubted that I could handle all of this… every day. But I’m proud to report – I’m doing it!

We’re doing it.

It’s quite a group I have around here.

There’s this one. He’s the worst. He’s so needy these days! And constantly under foot. Ugh – Duncan, GIT. He gets that a lot – I almost feel bad. But, he’s a good big brother and he’s playing with Leah and being kind to Quinn so I can’t hate him too much. He just stares at me when I’m occupied… like this…

Then there’s this one. Can we talk about that dimple? And that sneaky little smile? She’s too much. I will still call her a “pretty good baby,” however, she’s found her voice. Bummer. What she likes one day (walking/pacifiers/singing) she will hate the next. She can give me a run for the money – but she’s cute – so I’ll keep her. And kiss her. A lot.

And then there’s this one. My personal favorite. (Sorry, Quinn, but you can be kind of loud these days). Leah is a gem. She is sailing through big-sister-hood with flying colors. She is not jealous, or needy, or whiny. She is helping and loving and cheerful. Just what I need. She is keeping me sane. So much so, that I bought her the new Winnie the Pooh Christmas movie just because I’m so happy she’s here to help me. She can change her clothes and get her own snacks and hand me things when I’m all tied up with ^^ that one.

It was good for my soul to get back in the kitchen with her this morning.

I am virtually pain free and barely taking my Motrin – perhaps the biggest blessing. It allows me to move and bend and tend to whomever is neediest at the moment. If only I wasn’t so busy… I could really be productive.

This is all not to say there haven’t been moments of tears. Moments when we stare out the window for Kyle’s car to come around the corner. Moments when I want to run away for a second. Cause there have been. But mostly, I’m happy to be a mom of three. And I really like two of them. I haven’t snapped at Leah out of exhaustion, my biggest fear. We’re finding a good balance and I’ve got the girls sleeping at the same time – hallelujah – you will get blogs after all. I love the mornings (when energy is at it’s peak) and I crash into bed right after Quinn at 7:30. Or 8. Depending on if she’s behaving. Little miss has had great nights and not so great nights – I suppose it comes with the territory. Luckily, I know it doesn’t last long in the grand scheme of things. The worst part is that I still can’t drive so unless the whole family goes somewhere – I can feel quite trapped. But I’m thankful it’s much, much better than what I had worked up in my head. We will make it!

The biggest development came in the wee hours of the morning – Quinn’s disgusting cord stump fell off! Man, I hate those things. I hated Leah’s, too. But it’s gone now and you know what that means… BATH TIME TONIGHT.

And I will stop there and leave you with pictures because someone is starting to stir…

Leah wanted to lean like Quinn, ha. We gotta get that kid some head control.

Happy Birthday!

We’re here!

Everyone is still alive – and boy what a week! I’m not really sure how to write this blog, since there is so much to say and I really don’t even have words for a lot of it – but I will do what I do best with an abundance of information… bullets. Let’s go back a week, shall we?

November 1: Happy Birthday, little Quinn. Nickname to be determined later… we just can’t decide! Anyways… I will say this about her birthday – everyone should have a scheduled C-Section. Period. Just sign yourself up for one today. Okay, so that’s really freaking some of you out, I apologize. It’s not the way nature intended or something. But for me… and my babies… I love a good c- section. Here’s how it went: I woke up at 3:30am, showered, and got fully ready – heart pounding with anticipation. We loaded the car and got to the hospital at promptly 5:30. Went through two hours of questions/peeing in a cup/blood work/signing my life away/etc. At 7:30 I walked myself back to the OR, sat myself on the table, and stuck out my back for a spinal block. They laid me down, Kyle walked in, I went numb, and then this:

You.are.welcome. for that shot 🙂 There are actually way worse, thanks to Kyle, but this one gets the point across.

Unlike my surprise C-Section with Leah, I was fully aware of what was going on this time. I was happy and excited. My eyes were opening properly. I knew where I was. The drugs were not overwhelming, but just enough to keep me numb.

Leah: Had no idea where I was.

Quinn: Talking as it was going on, texting friends and family as they were sewing me back up.

At 8:19am we heard the world’s loudest and maddest cry. Quinn came roaring into the world. The first thing I heard from behind that lovely blue curtain was, “look at all the hair!” And I just wanted to shout, “I TOLD YOU SO!!” Seriously, I even wrote it in my blog as proof… 5 dreams… she had hair in every one. I knew she would have hair, I knew it! Man that felt good. Take that, Kyle. Mr, “there’s no way she’ll have hair.” Anyways… (clearly I’m still excited). This child can cry. And I cried right along with her. Man I was happy to see her (and her hair). And to hear her – gosh she was mad. Leah cried, but she stopped. Quinn let everyone know she was here and not happy with the care she was receiving. But soon enough, they got my guts back together, swaddled Quinn up, put me on a new bed, and handed me my baby! You’ll remember (or maybe you won’t) with Leah my arms (and everything) were numb so I could barely hold on to her and had to have help, I was terrified she would roll right off the bed. With Quinn, I held that girl tight all the way back to the room; kisses a plenty.

When we got back she got to eat right away – yay! And this time again I had to have no help. My arms worked properly to hold her and she came out ready for breakfast! It was everything I hoped and more (and still is). I was so happy to be functioning properly, for my eyes to be open, my arms not shaking, and my mental state was crystal clear.

Leah’s recovery: Eyes numb and shut. Nothing working. Other people holding my girl.

Quinn’s recovery: Perfect.

So all of that to say. To be able to go to a hospital, showered and ready to have a baby was so nice. To lay on a table and talk calmly to your husband while a doctor cuts you open and grabs your baby… even better. A scheduled c-section was perfect for us… nature be damned. 🙂

Recovery: I guess the next logical bullet would be my recovery. Well, if it hasn’t just been the easiest thing. I am barely ever in any pain and only taking Motrin (when I remember it). I was up and showering and brushing my teeth on Saturday in the hospital. Now I’m back to laundry and baking and dishes – what fun. But I am thankful I’m not bed or couch ridden. One side of my incision hurts occasionally when I move funny. I have no complaints.

Quinn: Would you like to know about her?? Well, she’s pretty darn squishy! She loves to sleep in her little snugabunny bouncer and it makes me laugh – Leah wouldn’t have been caught dead sleeping. Ever. She does as well as can be expected at night -waking up pretty much only to eat every three hours. I’m tired, but I suppose I can’t complain. She is a wonderful eater – came out knowing just what to do and hasn’t slowed down. She was born 8lbs 15oz, came home 8lbs 2oz, and at the doctor on Wednesday was 8lbs 9oz. Great progress. When she’s mad… she’s mad. I said it earlier, this kid can cry. She is loud and would like the world to know. Leah used to give me warning cries, “hey mom, I’m gonna make a little noise, feed me or it’ll get worse.” Quinn just starts out, “mom feed me! NOW!” She also doesn’t like to be disturbed… diapers, clothes, cold… please don’t upset her with any of those things. However, as mad as she can be, she’s pretty sweet. She seems to be laid back (aside from hunger) and like I said, the sleeping is something we’re getting used to as her big sister never just slept. It’s kind of fun. She’s very alert when she’s awake and “reflexes” or not – seems to be very smiley.

The little sister has arrived 🙂

The confidence: The best part of the past week – confidence! I love being a mom for a second time; much more than being a mom for the first time. The first time is laden with questioning everything you do, of listening to everyone else, of worrying constantly, and of more stress than enjoyment. This time around I have the confidence of having already raised one (at least 28 months worth) and it’s leaving me to just enjoy this time with Quinn. To not stress about how much she’s eating, but just to peacefully feed her until she’s full. To not stress about how much she’s sleeping (or not) but to just enjoy her pretty blue eyes when they’re open and treasure them when they’re closed. To not stress about doing it all, but realizing that this time is so short and the dishes will always be there. To not stress about what the books say, but to hold my Quinn when she wants me, feed her when I think she’s hungry, swaddle her when I think she needs to be snug as a bug, and talk to her when I think she’s wanting a friend. And most importantly to not stress about what everyone else thinks, but to just have confidence in myself and Kyle that we are fully capable of raising babies. It’s just more fun a second time around. I already catch myself thinking, “this time in a year…” and it makes me a little sad – even though the nights are long and the days are somewhat tricky -because I now know just how short a year can be.

The siblings: Oh, these two. They love her. Well, actually, Duncan might be having a little trouble adjusting, ha. He seems a little needy on the attention side, and a little aggravated at all the commotion overnight – but he does love to sniff her and sleep by her bouncer when she’s in it. Leah really loves her. She tells her bye when she leaves and when she comes home, she comes running in saying, “we’re here, baby! we’re here!” It’s very sweet. She likes to give her toys, tickle her toes, change her diaper, help her swing, and earlier today wanted to give her a high five. She wants to know where she is first thing in the morning and tells her goodnight at bedtime. It’s going to be fun watching them grow up together.

Leah has wanted two things since we made mention of a “baby.” To help change her and to help swing her. She finally got to try them both out. And loved every second.

Duncan is learning that he has another one to protect.

And today: And here we are today. A week of life with two. Kind of tricky, kind of wonderful. I’m mainly thankful for Kyle. He has saved me this week in regards to Leah. And everything. He’s doing anything and everything in regards to helping her and helping me. Which is leaving me eternally grateful… and completely terrified of next week when he leaves me alone with the three of them! Eeek. I’m thankful for my lack of pain and my fairly good energy level – but giving both girls the time they need all by myself… Help! I’ve gotten more positive as the days have gone on this week – hopefully by Monday I’ll be ready to go!

That gets you pretty much caught up. If you don’t hear from me for a while… well… there are three cute faces to blame.