Disappearing.

Doesn’t it ever get to be too much?

The liking and the statuses and the pictures and the games and the invitations and the notifications and the comments and the privacy settings and the apps and the ads and the tagging and the ____________. I feel like I could go on forever. There’s a lot to facebook. It’s so much more than it was 8 years ago when I joined. 8 years ago?! When it was just for college students, there was no newsfeed, not even pictures but a profile picture. I barely remember it. It’s wonderful in a lot of ways; the connections you can dig up or start up can have wonderful impacts on your life. It sure is easy to keep up with people, too. And it’s fun to see everyone’s life in action – I just took my dog to the park action. I mean who doesn’t like to know that there are people and dogs at parks??

And then there’s the safety side of it all. Do we not hear every day (ok, every other day) in the news about how facebook is now using your information for _______. That you need to adjust your privacy settings again because they found something else out. That advertisers can get any information they want about you? So just in a mama bear frame of mind – is it too much? Am I jeopardizing my kids in anyway? Probably not, but it does make me wonder. Is it going to get completely out of control at some point? Maybe, maybe not, but it does beg the question. At least to me.

I’ve had that thought for a long time now. That it might just be too much in a lot of ways. I’ve thought about doing away with it all for a very long time. But it’s addicting, no? What will I miss out on? What will you miss out on without my profile in your lives?? But it’s those very questions that lead me to take the big step. To disappear.

Not in a rude way (although it will sound rude), but why do I need to know what so and so from high school that I haven’t talked to in 10 years, but it would be awkward to unfriend, is doing for dinner? Why do I have to click on the Facebook app on my phone 73,000 times a day just so I don’t miss someone’s big news… that, in the scheme of my life, isn’t big news at all. And myself – why do I think everyone needs to see what I’m doing with Leah at the moment we’re doing it? That’s not to say I don’t want to share things, obviously I’m still blogging, but the instantaneous need to get information to Facebook got to be a little overpowering – for me. (Maybe you’re better at it).

It hit me real hard the other day when I was playing with Leah. Well, I was trying to play with Leah. And I was trying to facebook. And she caught me. Sitting in her playroom I took a cute picture of her to post. I started to get into the app and she looked at me and said, “mommy no this,” and pointed to my phone. Translation: mommy get off your phone and just play with me. It was maybe one of the biggest mom fail moments I’ve had with her so far. I wanted to cry. Why can’t you just play with your kid, Maria?! Facebook doesn’t need to see her right now… you need to see her… she needs you to see her… to play with her… to really, really, all hands in play with her. Leave your freaking phone on the counter downstairs and play with your daughter the way she deserves to be played with.

I was hard on myself over it. I still get mad. I don’t always do that, I did try to make a conscious effort to leave my phone alone when we were playing. But obviously, I wasn’t doing near a good enough job. So then I really got back to my I need to get rid of this plague that is Facebook mentality. It was too much for my two year old, and so it was too much for me. It had to be.

So here I am! I am disappeared! It’s pretty refreshing, I will say that. Kind of like I can breathe a little easier (although, I have a Quinn in my ribs so really I can’t breathe at all). I love to blog. I love to write about Leah and Duncan and Kyle and being married and being pregnant and being a homeowner and why you shouldn’t drink cows milk and baking muffins – I really love it. And the best part is, I can only do it when Leah sleeps or else she tries to type the keys and name the letters and she jumps on me and it’s a complete disaster :). So now I won’t get busted anymore! During her naps I used to sit down with the computer (if I had nothing to clean) and facebook stalk for 2 hours, learning things I didn’t care to know about people I barely knew in the first place. Now, I can either blog or I can get crazy making a nest, or I’ve even thought about taking up reading! (But that probably won’t happen). The point being, I can use two hours of every day to focus on my family, my life, my house -not yours. I am happy that you are having a good day, or I’m sorry that you got a speeding ticket – but really – I don’t need to know. My day will go on regardless of what blows up (or used to blow up) my Facebook newsfeed.

I’m excited to see how it all goes. To see a life without facebook. To use my phone less. To work on this blog more. To make actual photo albums instead of facebook albums. To not feel the need to tell you that Leah and I bought Kyle apples from the store. To learn to fully devote my playtime with Leah to actually playing with Leah. To not deal with the political correctness of it all; Heaven forbid putting up the wrong status. To not deal with the social correctness of it all; friending someone because you “should” and not because you actually like them. To not think in terms of “likes” and “statuses.” To just write my little ol’ blog and having you read it should you so choose.

Maybe I’ll hate it, I don’t know. Maybe I’ll feel all alone while the rest of the world is still inside everyone else’s business. Maybe I’ll come crawling back. But so far so good. So far I’m happy with my choice.

I’m happy to have disappeared.

Heads Up.

I’m not sure that there is a better looking pantry in America right now.

This ridiculously hot Friday (90 at 9am, really?!) started with a trip to Sams. Sometimes I love that place, sometimes I hate it. Today I loved it. Probably because I was starving when we went, so it was exciting just to see food. But when we got home the real fun started.

I needed a place to put all of that food – and realized just how dirty and cluttered the pantry was. Unacceptable. A dirty nest is not okay these days. So Leah and I got to work. She loves jobs where she can just empty things; this was definitely her kind of task. So we gutted it. I threw away a lot of really old food – pretty embarrassing – but it felt good, nonetheless. Then we restocked, and that felt even better. Everything has a place now, with space left over! It’s amazing what a little organization will do for a person. I’m pretty proud of the job we did, and man it feels good. Quinn will be very happy to come home to a neat pantry. If only I can keep it that way for 8 more weeks.

8 more weeks! Ahh! Ok, not really just 8. 8 weeks and 6 days :). She is a very crazy little thing; and seems to be the most crazy in the shower? I don’t know what it is but she really gets going when I take showers. She also loves the nighttime hours, grrrreat. She almost always plays dead the second Kyle touches my belly, no matter how crazy she is acting. Something Leah never did. She is somewhere between 3.5 and 4lbs. They think. I’ve started laundry – oh boy! Nothing too special, I’m starting with all the boring stuff. I don’t want the bedding or clothes to get re-dirty sitting around these next 8 weeks. But it’s still fun to wash little things. I threw a couple new things on the walls. I’m currently searching for the perfect diaper bag. The one I used/still use for Leah is pretty gross after two years of solid use so I just kind of feel like starting over. I would hate to put a new little coming home from the hospital outfit in a bag with granola bars stuck to the bottom. Right? So we’ll see what I can come up with. As far as her mom, my back hurts. A lot. Probably because of all the crazy nesting. It just hurts constantly. Today I woke up and my leg was tingly, that was fun. It’s pretty hard to get comfortable sleeping – I remember this stretch well from Leah. If I think about drinking water I have to pee. I’m still enjoying it though. I still like her in my belly, although I’m very excited to see her. I’m trying not to wish these last weeks away though 1) because staying home with two is slightly terrifying 2) I want to soak up all the alone time with Leah I can, realizing it’s never coming back and 3) because Quinn is a fun little womb-mate, she keeps me laughing. And just like with Leah I’m enjoying hosting her. Time is flying, I guess it’s my job to focus on cherishing it.

But here’s what you really need to know:

Do you like this blog? Do you like seeing pictures of Leah and Duncan? Are you excited to see what Quinn looks like? Are you anxious to see if Kyle will pass his test? Are you enjoying reading about all the new things I’m organizing every day? Well then you’re gonna need to become a follower. Or write the website down. Or something. I’m not going to post links to this anymore on facebook – because I’m not gonna have facebook anymore. So unless you become a follower and get the email that I’ve posted – you’re not gonna know.

Just a little heads up.

I will detail all of that in the next blog – that you will see and click on through your email should you become a follower. If not. Well.

Goodbye?

Getting Somewhere.

I’m only blogging right now because I know if I don’t take this next 1+ hour to sit, my body will hate me by the end of the day. I told you I was going to go crazy when we got back from Poplar Bluff, and well, I wasn’t kidding. The nesting is in complete overdrive; this morning it included cleaning the basement! The unfinished basement. The basement where all we do is jump, and throw toys, and stack plastic tubs full of crap. The basement people rarely see is now pretty stinking clean and organized. And it feels so good. I love the sense of accomplishment that comes with the overpowering need to nest. My back is incredibly upset with me now, but the rest of me feels so darn refreshed. We’ve got quite the stack of crap ready for the trash man! And just like when I nested with Leah, a lot of Kyle’s stuff didn’t fare too well.

But I am not here to talk about the basement. I have much more enjoyable things to talk about. We are getting somewhere with this baby! In just three days, I’m amazed at the amount of things I’ve been able to accomplish. With a lot of help from my little girl. She is loving working with me in Quinn’s room. It keeps us both occupied for a good chunk of the day. And that is good because the heat wave of the summer is going on outside and my 31 week belly is not about to go out there. We have had lots of little sorting/folding/organizing parties to do over the past three days, but we’ve also had some big, fun projects! Like this:

She has a bouncer! Put together all by yours truly and a two year old. She was very excited to get the batteries in and turn it on… and off… and on… and off. 🙂 Sweet girl.

Then I tackled this one all by myself:

I took this sucker apart piece by piece, cleaned it, disinfected it, washed the cloth parts, and reassembled it. Not easy my friends, not easy. But it’s done! And clean! And:

Ready for a game of Peek-A-Boo in November! And:

Fully protected from the elements.

Car seat: check.

Then I really got crazy.

Yesterday I called to check on the crib, whatdoyouknow, it’s still on backorder! And they have no idea when they’ll get it in! Which means they have no idea when it will ship! Which means I have no idea when I will get it! BUT, instead of throwing the fit I wanted to – I calmly walked to the tool box, got out the spackle, found some white paint, and went to work. Which I should have done two months ago.

It had to go up. It just had to. This baby has to have a bed. And I realize that we still have 9 weeks left and that it easily could still come before she is born; however, I cannot live with parts and tools on the floor anymore. And it’s already been 8 weeks and I still don’t have it, sooooo. I couldn’t take the bedding just sitting around taking up space for one more second. I had to get it together. And if the new part comes before she is born, great, I’ll take it apart and put the new piece on. But if it doesn’t… my spackle/paint job looks pretty darn good and I could care less at this point.

She has a bed!

Do you want to see it?!

Not too terrible, right?! Can you see my spackle job?? I’m so excited that it’s all together and no longer spread all over the floor! With the completion of this lovely little piece of furniture – we pretty much have a room! Want to see the rest?

Walking in. It turned out just how I hoped it would. I just saw purple when we named Quinn. I feel like the room fits the name. They say the second kids get the shaft a lot of the time… not this time. She got the better nursery. 🙂

And now we’ll go the other way:

I have things left to hang on those walls so I can’t quite call it finished… but I can definitely sleep at night now.

Then there’s this guy – who is getting very excited for another little sister:

And big sister, not to be outdone in a picture:

They are very relieved that Quinn has a bed. And very excited big siblings. 🙂

This weekend baby girl will get another swing, and her mom will raid her cousin Ali’s closet for fun clothes. I called my insurance yesterday and my FREE breastpump is in the mail! My Christmas present stash is growing by the day. Big progress this week – big progress.

We’re getting somewhere now, folks!

And We’re Back.

We did it. We completed a little 30 weeks pregnant mom and Leah vacation.

Shew!

It wasn’t the easiest thing in the world, let me tell you. But nothing at 30 weeks pregnant comes easily. However, it was still a blast. I hate that my parents don’t live close. That we have to plan trips to see them. That we have to pack and navigate and fill up gas tanks to get there. BUT – seeing Leah get so excited knowing where we’re headed, or get so excited when we finally get there kind of makes it all worth it. It has its own little dose of special, the fact that they don’t live close. It gives us something to look forward to, new surroundings, new things to do.

I told her literally 3 minutes before we walked out the door that we were going to go to Nana’s – you should have seen that little face light up! She immediately said, “I jump on nana’s ____” she didn’t finish the sentence, but she meant to say bed. She remembered from the last time we were there jumping like a nut on Nana’s bed while getting 5 Little Monkeys recited to her. Obviously, it was a highlight. So I told her yes, she could jump on Nana’s – but first we had to get in the car and take a drive… and she had to nap in the car. She was just so excited; she grabbed her Pooh and her blanket and beat me to the door. Her dad tucked her in the carseat, gave her a kiss, and we were off.

She slept the whole way! (Which is why she’s my favorite).

Don’t you just want to eat her?!

My biggest problem turned out to be the drive. It’s not easy to sit still and pregnant for almost three hours. Every inch of me hurt. But I had one goal, to get there. And we did – and we learned Poppy wasn’t home, so we headed straight for Nana:

Leah running, Nana’s arms open wide – it was too much for my heart. Made the drive worth it, and I would have done it all over again to see that reaction again. We played helped Nana work for a little bit, then took off for home. And then we found Poppy:

And Bella:

Leah loves Bella. Bella… isn’t used to kids. However, on this trip she learned that Leah will play with her so she was much more accepting than in trips past. They had a pretty good time together. The days were filled with Bella and Nana and Poppy and playing and frozen yogurt and swinging on the back porch and shopping and swimming:

And then there were the nights.

When I learned that Leah doesn’t sleep anywhere but in her own room. Oh my goodness, we had to fight for some sleep at Nana’s. The first night she fell asleep at 11:30! It was a mix of being excited, being tired, crying, and talking to herself about Nana and Poppy. I decided it would be the easiest if we shared a room/bed since I thought Leah was not going to even know what to do in the crib anymore, but I don’t know what would have worked at this point. So night one was a bust. I was out of my mind tired from getting her to sleep and then trying to sleep with her and without my snoogle! I had much higher hopes for night two, and had some things I was going to change, sure it would make a difference. It didn’t. We had the same results with just a slightly earlier bedtime. It was in the middle of night two when I had two little feet in my chin that I decided we would be in our own beds for night three.

Upside down.

We had plans to stay until Sunday afternoon, but I just couldn’t keep up that awful nighttime routine – we both needed some good sleep before a new week started. So we had a wonderful day all day on Saturday… and left at bedtime. Oh, she screamed when we left. Maybe the most awful thing to ever hear, “more nana! more nana!” The only reason I got her out of that house was the promise of seeing Duncan… and Duncan’s friend Evie. She agreed to come with me under the promise that she could play with Duncan when she got home. I was hoping she would be asleep when we got home and forget about our deal, but I was prepared to let her play if I had to – what’s one more late night?!

Another long, painful, and this time sad drive home. I hated leaving early knowing how much fun Leah was having, but I was also grateful that for the first time in three nights she was sleeping at 8:30pm instead of screaming. And I was anxious to cuddle up with my snoogle and without little feet. I was excited to see Kyle and even Duncan and to have a day of rest on Sunday. The whole quiet drive home I thought of Quinn (because she does not sit still in cars), what I needed to do this week and with the 9 remaining weeks we have, and how to get my parents to move!? Stubborn people they are.

Just like I had hoped, I had a sound asleep Leah when we pulled in at 9:30. Her daddy carried her up to her bed without her even waking up. I melted into my bed.

And now we’re back. First things first Sunday morning, a reunion:

It’s not the greatest picture, but you can see the top of Leah’s head and the two of them leaning into one another.

All day Sunday she went through the list of things she wanted to do with her dad checking them off one by one. She had fun with her Nana and Poppy for sure, but she doesn’t last very long at all without her dad:

We’re back to routine now. We’ve got a couple good nights of sleep under our belt. Kyle has his man weekend out of his system. I made a batch of banana/squash muffins, did the laundry, restocked the fridge and pantry, and Leah and I got to work in Quinn’s room today:

Ha. We found the hat Leah wore in the hospital 🙂

Now we’re in finishing mode. Finishing up these last 9 weeks of making a Quinn. Finishing up these last 9 weeks of intense studying. Finishing a nursery. Finishing laundry. Finishing putting gadgets together. Finishing Christmas shopping. 67 days is the count. 66 until the test.

We’re back. And now we get to work.

S T O P.

The buggie needs an update. Her little life is just going by so fast. I find myself doing that mom thing more and more; you know, where you just sit and stare at them wondering when the heck they grew up? She might still be two, but she is just running through her days of being little – literally.

I’ll start with today. Today when I got my socks blown off. So, we all know she’s on a letters kick. I think she may know them all by now? She knows too many for me to keep track of, I know that much. Maybe she doesn’t know “v” – we don’t talk much about that one. But the rest, she’s got’em down. Letters are fun! I love it, and she is loving learning and playing with them. So, it’s not uncommon for us to be driving now and I hear from the backseat, “D – Dunkie!” “L – Me!” “P – Pooh!” She knows what letters go with what words, and she loves to find them. Car riding is a whole new adventure. Today we were driving out of the neighborhood, stopped at a stop sign and I hear a squeal of delight from the back, “S!” I look in the rearview mirror and see a little finger pointing straight at the stop sign. I say, “ya! good job, what else do you see?” And she continued on with, “T O P.” I was just blown away. Is that reading? Ha. I’m calling it reading. Smart little thing. I told her it said, “stop” and she stuck both her hands out as if to freeze – or stop. And now we are obsessed with stop signs.

It’s just things like that that make me stare at her for an awkwardly long time while we’re eating or watching TV. In one more blink she’ll be reading books to her baby sister.

She’s also started in with four word sentences. Let the record show, the first was, “daddy cleaned up car.” Does that tell you how dirty the van was? He cleaned it for me one night after she went to bed and the next morning when we got in it she waved her little hands around and said, “oooooh, this!” I told her that her daddy cleaned it and all day she reminded me, “daddy cleaned up car!” Very sweet, but at the same time can I get an “oooooooh” every time I unload the dishwasher? Or do a load of laundry? Or clean the house every single day!? His one cleaning project, and she’s still talking about it. Last night I cleaned her playroom while she was taking a bath and when she got out and saw it she said, “daddy cleaned this!” Leah, MOMMY CLEANS, TOO! A LOT.

Ugh.

She’s cute though. It’s fun to hear her talk and talk and talk. And watch her use her imagination. The kid can pretend play like it’s nobodies business. It took us 45 minutes to get ready today, because not only did Leah have to go potty and brush her teeth and comb her hair – but so did Pooh. And that bear doesn’t do anything quickly. Pretend food might be her favorite; we spend a lot of time eating air. And drinking TEA – which is a favorite to say. She loves her shadow. I’m not sure there’s anything more innocent than watching a toddler play with and get excited by their shadow. It just makes me mush every single time. It takes us forever to move forward if heaven forbid her shadow is behind her. She also loves to find the moooooooooooon.

In the world of sports – one remains elite around here – gymnastics. We’ve done soccer for three weeks now, and well, we’re all a little bored. I’m excited that there’s just one week left, I’ll admit it. She has fun going, and she loves doing it with her dad; but it’s in no comparison to gymnastics. She’s been showing less and less interest as the weeks go by. It’s a two year old soccer class, so obviously there isn’t going to be a lot of soccer, but even the things they do – she doesn’t want to participate in. She likes the running and the kicking – when she wants to. Other than that she runs away from her dad or the class or anywhere. I think we’ll do it when she’s old enough to be in a real class/team atmosphere, but now it’s just not at all worth the money. Gymnastics though; I would sell a kidney to keep her in gymnastics. We’ve been doing it since April and I don’t ever get sick of taking her – and she certainly doesn’t get sick of going. She is excited, and happy, and crazy every single week. She runs from activity to activity squeezing in as much movement as possible in the 45 minutes we’re there. I’m amazed at her every single week, too. She just gets better and better. She’s learning about moving her body, she’s getting more flexible, more coordinated, more social, more everything! It’s just a good place for her to be. She does something a little more challenging every week. Outside of scheduled classes though, she is loving playing baseball in the backyard with her dad. I get even more of those mom moments where I watch the two of them from the kitchen window while I get dinner ready and think, “is this real life? Is he really that good of a dad? Is she really that adorable? Those two out there swinging and running around are mine? Forever?” It’s a little overwhelming the good feelings that happen when I get to watch them. Straight from the movies moments. It’s hands down her favorite time of every single day. We talk a lot all day long about, “daddy bay ball, me?” “yup! you and daddy baseball when he gets home.” “ok!” She’s asks constantly if it’s time yet, and then she brings him his tennis shoes when he does get home and ready to play…

Just in case he would ever forget.

I wish Quinn had a little peephole in my belly, so she could see just what kind of a dad she’s getting. She’d be pretty stinking excited to know what’s coming her way.

The sweetest news as of late, however, is that she is getting excited for Quinn. We had a conversation the other day about how Quinn will come out of mommy’s belly soon – and will play with Leah! That perked her interest real quick. She suggested they wee together (swing). I said sure she can swing with you and she got even more excited. Then I asked what else she’d like to do with baby Quinn and she said, Dunkie, and ball, and jump – but mainly wee. She just gets the sweetest, most excited little voice when she starts talking about playing with her sister. She really thinks about what they’ll do together. I hope Quinn comes out walking, or it’s gonna be a long wait for the jumping partner. For now until Quinn comes out we are taking the “you’re gonna have a playmate!” approach – it’s working splendidly so far.

And that should be about it.

Letters and sports sum up our days.

 

 

Cake Day!

It was doctor’s appointment day – you know what that means…

Now it’s cake day!

Ever since 21 weeks I’ve been busting my tail to keep myself in check. Blah. I’ve told you this, so I won’t go into grave detail, but just know that it’s paying off. My last appointment, I had gained one pound – yes! This appointment I had gained 3 – yes! My goal for every appointment starting after 21 weeks has been to just gain the one pound a week. And so far, I’ve done good enough to have four pounds left over! Now, you should know that I am absolutely, positively not dieting. I’m not running marathons. I’m not starving myself (or Quinn). I eat when I’m hungry or she gets real mad. I understand that I’m growing a baby and that she needs food – so I will eat. But, it’s amazing what healthy choices can do for a person. What not eating out can do. What cutting out cake and adding in muffins will do. It’s changed our entire way of thinking around here. It’s now easier and more fun to get crazy in the kitchen than it is to go out and feel guilty… and stuffed.

So today is the day we celebrate! Actually, remember when I said we’d go out once a month after these appointments? Well, scratch that. I’m having too much fun cooking and figuring out new, healthy recipes! So tonight, instead of going out, we’ll have a somewhat unhealthy/carb loaded chicken parmesan! Yum! I gave Kyle three choices of what he’d want and told him to tell me his top two and then I’d pick the final. Well, chicken parmesan was not in his top two, but I’m the pregnant one and doesn’t it sound so good?! He said he didn’t actually care, but was curious as to why I gave him a choice in the first place. Ha. I’m not sure. I was trying to be polite, I suppose. Until he picked the wrong answer. 🙂

But then. After dinner. I’m gonna sit down with a big, fat, piece of cake. With real icing and no vegetables inside.

Y U M.

Is it bedtime yet? I’m already drooling.

The rest of the appointment was good. Quinn was well behaved and had a 150 heartbeat. She’s been rather sleepy today; which makes sense because yesterday she had an extra dose of crazy. I learned I passed the glucose (diabetes) test with a perfect score (all the more reason to eat cake). I’m not anemic. Blood pressure good. No damage from our fall over the weekend. Measuring on track. No swelling. The ring still fits. Light stretch marks. Faint brown line. All in all, we’re entering the 30 week mark in perfect condition. Yay!

Today was the last of the four week appointments. Now we go every two weeks! You know what that means – this baby is getting closer and closer to coming out! We’re gonna be in the 30s in two days. Things are going by at the speed of light. I could really use a crib. They said it should ship at the end of this week, perhaps next week. It takes everything I have not to call and check on it every single day. Ugh, ugh, ugh.

Leah and I are taking a little trip to the forest this weekend – yay Nana and Grandpa! Kyle owes me big time for taking my big belly and constantly full bladder on a two and a half hour car ride with a two year old so that he can play golf all weekend with his friends. But I’m excited nonetheless, and Leah will be excited when I tell her (when we’re 5 minutes from their house). She loves exploring everything the country has to offer. And don’t worry, I’m bringing muffins.

When we get back, however, it is game on with this baby. The room will get finished. The laundry will get started. The last minute things will get purchased. The breast pump will get ordered. The decorations will get hanged. Even the Christmas presents will start to get ordered. I realize I’ve still got 10 weeks (well 9 after we get back), but you never know what could happen. You never know who will come down with some sort of sickness. I don’t want to wait any longer. The studying around here is about to pick up even more, see ya, Kyle. As much as I can get done now while I’m still capable of moving, the better I will sleep at night.

Fun times are ahead!

Bird Biscuits.

Guess who was up at 5:30, and baking a fresh batch of muffins at 5:45am?

This girl.

I am so welcoming energy and a good mood into my life today. The weekend was rough. I was completely pregnant this weekend, and had very little fun. For starters, I was in this lovely little pattern of waking up with a headache every day for four days – that alone will wear a person out. But I was also nauseous. Exhausted. Sore. In a bad mood. And emotional. Oh yes, and then I fell on a street while holding Leah. I hate those days so much, especially when they’re on the weekends, but I have Leah’s pregnancy to remind me that they won’t last long. That all will return to normal soon. And to just get through it. I will enjoy being pregnant again soon.

And soon came! This morning! I’m back to smiling at the massive lump in my midsection instead of cursing it.

First things first with my energy, I had to get my muffins in the oven! I’m not sure how to quite explain this compulsive need to bake constantly – but it’s overpowering. I’m quite literally obsessed. Anyone want anything? So I made some muffins in the quiet of dawn, started a load of laundry, washed some dishes, made Kyle eggs, packed his lunch, and cleaned the kitchen.

WHAT?!

Those things didn’t happen all weekend, yet somehow all of them happened in 30 minutes this morning. Pregnancy is weird.

And then Leah woke up (to warm zucchini, apple, flax muffins and a banana), we had breakfast, worked in Quinn’s room (her new favorite thing is sorting lil sisters clothes), and were out the door for an oil change.

WHAT?!

Mind you, it’s not even 8am. We don’t normally get off the couch until 8:30. It’s a day I’m thankful for, that’s for sure. I have to store these days up in my brain and remember them on days like I had over the weekend – to remind myself that there are ups and downs for sure in the 10 months of growing a baby. Take advantage of the ups, and just get through the downs.

So we walk into the oil change place – maybe my least favorite activity ever – and we’re met with a new (clean) waiting room and a kids area complete with a Winnie the Pooh foam letter puzzle laid out on the floor. Leah and I both squealed a little I think. We were in and out of there in no time flat (because it’s just that good of a day) and home to play outside with the mutt.

Then my favorite thing happened. I got an itch to bake. Four hours after the first itch I had to bake. And when you get an itch, you have to scratch.

Whole wheat biscuits for dinner – because brown rice tastes like dirt.

I asked Leah if she wanted to help – as always I got a smile, a jump, and a YA! Love that little helper. She always thinks we make cake, too, which helps with her enthusiasm. I cleaned off the table and we got to work.

I love cooking with this kid. So much. And today she said Teaspoon 🙂

The pastry blender is great fun.

Then we strettttch it out.

And now we add the birds. I had this great idea – because the recipe suggested it – to let Leah pick whichever cookie cutter she wanted to use instead of just a circle biscuit cutter. She very excitedly picked the bird. She wanted Bird Biscuits. And she called them her ducks.

First duck goin in!

And onto the pan he goes. She did this process all by herself. She’s quite the baker.

Our first duck 🙂 Tasty little suckers.

The whole flock. Yum! She is very excited to give one to her dad later.

(Nevermind the one top left, we ran out of enough dough to make a last duck).

Then we sat down with some butter and some honey and enjoyed the fruits of our labor.

Biscuits are always a good idea.

Doctor’s Office Fun.

I think know that I had the most fun with Leah at a doctor’s appointment yesterday.

Hey, I was only a month and a week behind this time -go me! This was primarily her two year old check up, and frankly I just don’t care. I cared when she was two months. I cared that she was gaining weight. I cared to have reassurance about our parenting skills. And it’s not that I don’t care if she’s growing or not now – but I can see her thriving… so I don’t really care what a growth chart tells me. I don’t need to have her weighed. I don’t need him to tell me that she’s fine… I can see every day that she is more than fine. She can tell me when things hurt, so I don’t have to wonder. She can tell me if she’s hungry so I don’t need to obsess about if she’s eating enough. I trust her (as scary as that is) to tell me if she’s doing fine or not.

And don’t worry – he told us – she is. Of course.

It was pretty funny right off the bat. The second I told her we were going she got really excited and wanted to get in the car. What a goof. She is very used to going to my doctor’s appointments for Quinn now; so she knows the routine. She was certain they were going to check on the baby in her belly :). I told her he would also look in her ears and eyes and she got even more excited. She actually cried when we didn’t leave the second she woke up from her nap.

She got even more excited when we got there. When our nurse called her name she ran back, elbows flailing to the sides in excitement. She was so ready to step on the scale and wait patiently for the beep. Then she stood more still than I’ve ever seen her as they measured her – 3 feet on the dot! Oh, and 29.2lbs. Then she ran happily down to the room, hopped on the table, laid down, and lifted up her shirt!!

She wanted them to check her baby!

I almost died.

The nurse humored her after I explained the situation and gave her a couple belly squeezes. Then Leah sat up and got her blood pressure taken like a champ. I could tell she knew exactly what was happening thanks to seeing me do it every month for the past 7 months. She was such a big girl. Sat so still when she needed to and answered questions when she needed to.

When we got to see the doctor she wanted to tell him all about Duncan. And Duncan’s friend Evie. I’ve really rarely seen her so excited and talkative – even for Leah. She let him look in her ears and eyes and made sure he checked on her baby as well. She loved touching her toes while he made sure her spine was straight (unlike her mother’s). Then he asked to see her teeth and she gave him the biggest, cheesiest grin I’ve ever seen her give. It really was quite a show.

My favorite part of the trip, though, was when he asked, “does she have any interest in dressing or undressing herself yet?”

Ha! Doc. Let me tell you a little something about Leah… Would you like to see a picture? Or 5000?

He also asked if she had any interest in potty training. Again. Let me explain this kid…

Overall, he was impressed with her friendliness (it was seriously out of control), her vocabulary, and how much she seemed to move. Ha. And she showed off the potty skills by telling him she had to “poop.” He told me that when she really gets ahold of talking in sentences she’s going to be the one that talks all day long no matter who’s listening… perfect. Good thing she has Duncan :).

I was impressed by him though, as I usually am. Not some sort of infatuation or anything, I just like the way he thinks, which is good, because we specifically picked him hoping he would think like he does. That not everything requires medicine, not every kid is built the same, not all kids follow the same pattern, and milk is the devil. Ha, okay, not really. Somehow it comes up at every appointment, I suppose because we go over what she eats and doesn’t eat, drinks and doesn’t drink. We got a big thumbs up for Almond Milk. He was very happy we’ve never done cows milk – and I was very happy that he was happy with that. He gets it; I’ve told you this before. This is my number one reason I like having Leah in his care. He understands that we’re not trying to grow a cow – we’re trying to grow a Leah. And growing she is, at just the right pace for her body. She is in the 75th percentile for both height and weight, which technically, is perfect – she is perfectly proportionate. No cows needed.

My other tied for number one reason I like my kids (Quinn got signed up for him, too) in his care is vaccines. Vaccines are a very personal topic/choice. I would never tell you to vaccinate or not vaccinate your kids. I would highly recommend you not just do what someone tells you, however. Do your own research, do what makes sense to you for your kids. With Leah it was that she get one vaccine per appointment and starting at 4 months. Maybe 2 shots, depending. I even took her in on a couple occasions just to get a particular shot, so it wouldn’t coincide with another. He was willing to work with us, and able to see my side of the argument. That alone is a big plus in any doctor, for any topic. So Leah had one more left – chicken pox. The one I cared least about her getting; however, was ready to just get it over with. However, he told me he didn’t need to do it if I wasn’t comfortable with it due to the pregnancy. I was confused? Apparently, there is a small risk that I could get the chicken pox from Leah getting the vaccine, and then Quinn getting it which would be horrible. I had no idea! And I read a lot on this, believe me. He said we could do it today, the risk was small. We could do it after Quinn was born. We could do it when Leah was three. Or we could wait til she starts Kindergarten! Ha. Just the fact that he warned me was a big deal to me. I like that he thought of us as a whole family, instead of just sticking with the vaccine schedule (which we’ve botched up pretty good already). I’m just happy that he thinks, in general. He looks at the picture as a whole – me being pregnant, new baby, Leah not in grave danger of the chicken pox – all go together to make an informed choice.

So we will wait. Until she’s 3 or 5 I don’t know. But she got out of it today, you’re welcome sweetie. It was just a fun day at the doctor’s office all around. Everyone left happy.

Let’s just hope the next time we go is for Quinn’s 3 day (or so) check up!

And now you’re all updated on Leah’s medical history.

 

200 Days.

Today’s kind of a big deal, we’re doing a little bit of celebrating. I have been carrying a Quinn around for 200 days now.

200 days!

Now, I didn’t just sit around and count up all the days; I have a pregnancy app to do it for me. For those of you that don’t sit around and count days, and also don’t have pregnancy apps – 200 days ago was February! Pregnant or not – that’s a lot of time gone by! Where did this year go, my goodness. I swear they go faster and faster.

I’m so happy to be here. To have 200 days of a second healthy pregnancy under my belt. To be anticipating the next and final 80 with just pure joy. I’m just in a really wonderful fog; have been since last night. The beautiful weather is also helping this wonderful fog.

We got to hang out with the little nut last night. No worrying about a heart. No guessing her gender. No hoping they see what they need to. No worrying about defects. Just going to see our baby Quinn, and to watch her be herself for 45 minutes.

It was so much fun!

With Leah, we did maternity pictures. And, I suppose I’m happy to have had them taken, however, I’ll probably never do them again. You just can’t hang pictures of your giant belly in the middle of the living room. Well, maybe you can. But I can’t. It just seemed awkward everywhere I tried to put them. A bit of a waste of money in that regard. We shoved a couple in the bathroom and one on my nightstand and Kyle took one to work – but for the money we paid – well – we probably won’t do that again. Live and learn. So we decided to put our pennies towards actually seeing who’s inside my belly. The much better choice. If you’re a grandparent looking for a gift to new parents, or a friend with money to blow on someone you love, or an aunt or an uncle or you’re carrying a baby right at this very moment – go buy one of these packages either for yourself or someone you know. I don’t know how they do them elsewhere, but where we went there was a giant room, with a comfy table for mama, appointment only so no waiting, no full bladder required(!), nothing was rushed – definitely not your doctors appointment ultrasound. It was just all about getting to know your baby. Getting to know our baby.

Getting to know Quinn.

And get to know Quinn we did.

This kid is funny! I told myself if I came away with one good picture I would be happy. And if I got a smile I would be over the moon. You guys, I got about 20 smiles. We got a tongue stuck out. We got a roll. We got an umbilical cord across the face which prompted a big stretch from little miss to get it off! We got a case of the hiccups. We got a flexed bicep for daddy. We got cute feet and crazy hands. We got open eyes (creepy!). We got drinking amniotic fluid – which prompted the hiccups. It was just a regular circus in there. I can’t explain to you how cool it is to just know what’s going on in my belly. To have a face to put with all the jabs I feel throughout the day. To know that when she gets the hiccups it’s probably because she just took a big drink. To know that she has the tiniest bit of peach fuzz on the top of her head. To know that she pretty much looks like her sister. To know that at least for last night her head was in my ribs and her feet were tucked right by my belly button. That her hands wave all over the place, and that is what I probably feel most often. That she likes to sit with her legs crossed at the ankles. That her umbilical cord gets in her way a lot and she gets rather annoyed and gives herself a good stretch to get it the heck off of her; probably what’s happening when I get a big move. That she is a real freaking baby. Weighing in at three and a half pounds – bigger than she should be at this point – just how mama likes her girls. 🙂

200 days with her and I feel like now I know her. When she rolls all over my belly like she is right now, I can imagine her little smile or perhaps her getting mad at her cord again. Maybe her smiles are involuntary muscle spasms to you, but to me they mean she is happy and she likes my uterus an awful lot. That she’s enjoying all the muffins. She seems to have a personality, with still 11 weeks left to grow. I wish we could do that every week. But I suppose the next time we see her it will be in real life – and that will trump all. For now I will look at these 83 pictures over and over and over again. I will continue to go over them with Leah trying my hardest to explain that this little thing is coming out someday soon and will be here to play with her for the rest of her life.

Now I suppose I will spend the next 80 in faithful prayer that all will go as it should. That at the end there will be a healthy, happy baby in my arms. That she would wait until November 1, even though she’s growing a couple weeks ahead of schedule. Things are about to get frantic – I can feel it coming. Kyle has already upped the studying hours. Although the list of things she needs has dwindled considerably, the few left really need to get done. I’ve started to sit down and really do a clothes inventory figuring out how much of what she needs for when. I would like a crib in the next 80 days please and thank you, UPS. I’m at the point where I pee constantly, waddle, must eat when I must eat, and my beginning maternity clothes aren’t quite cutting it – we’re getting to the end. I can feel it coming. 200 days flew, and I have a feeling the last 80 aren’t about to slow down.

It’s been quite the 200 days. But I’m excited for the final stretch!

I was in a side by side kind of mood today; so enjoy the following:

Day 1. Day 200. Can I still call it bloating??

That lovely little face is just hanging out in that lovely little belly.

Later.

I think I’ve said “later” 425,000 times since yesterday afternoon.

I made a big mistake. A big mom mistake. I brought Leah home some new shorts for soccer, and when she woke up from her nap I asked her to try them on for me. Well, what do you think she thought?

She thought it was time for soccer.

Or, ball, as she calls it.

Oh, boy. Starting then, I (well, I hated myself) and I also started trying to explain to her that we would go to soccer later. Tomorrow (today). Later. Later. Later. We will go to soccer later.

She hasn’t forgotten – even overnight. The very first word out of her mouth this morning when she saw me was, “ball!” Later, baby. Later. Tonight. After dinner. Later. We will go to soccer later.

Later.

I know she really has no concept of time, nor does she really understand what later means – but it’s the best I can come up with for now. She certainly doesn’t understand 6:30… so later has to work. Even though it’s clearly not.

I smile every time though, I love it. She is so stinking excited!

I never thought I’d be one of those parents. Who has their kid in multiple activities… at age two no less! Going back to judgy moms, I probably would have done some serious internal judging. How exhausting for that poor child – dragging them everywhere at all hours of the day! Rushing through dinner and ignoring family time. It just proves you can’t judge a mom – you don’t truly know their kid. You don’t know what they can handle or what they enjoy.

We had ourselves a Leah. Who doesn’t want to sit, ever. Who has to move and run and jump and swing and spin and kick and bounce and climb and throw at every waking moment. She moves until the very last second she falls asleep – most of the time it looks as if her little body has passed out from exhaustion in the middle of an activity.

What do you do with a kid like that??

Well, you find what they seem to like the best and you scout out area classes and you drain your bank account to sign them up. You put them in some kind of energy draining class in hopes they will find some kind of fulfillment. That they will play with other kids and learn to follow instructions from someone other than you.

In our case, you sign them up for two 45 minute classes a week. Soccer and gymnastics. The most running/flipping/swinging/coordinating/kicking classes you can find. And you hope they enjoy them. And you really hope they return to you tired!

The proof that we are not screwing Leah up by putting her in two sports at age 2 is the fact that I have said later a million times in the past 24 hours. That we have to talk about what she will do tonight at “ball” with her dad over and over and we have to youtube videos of soccer just to satisfy her need to obsess about it for the day. And the fact that on Thursday’s I have learned that I cannot under any circumstances tell her it’s gymnastics day until 15 minutes before we walk out the door or else she will take all of her clothes off (if they aren’t already), go find her leotard, put it on, and stand by the door saying, “car?!” until we leave.

It’s exhausting. She’s exhausting. But in just 4 hours I get to watch her and Kyle run up and down the soccer field like maniacs and be thankful that we rushed dinner to get her out there as soon as possible! And next week… she will have no knowledge of this class until after dinner.

Think, Maria, think!